The other day, Imanuel and Micah were playing (-and when they play, they mean business!) and I was in the kitchen doing some cooking. All of a sudden, Imanuel shrieked quite loudly, “MOMMY! IT’S A DISASTER!” Now, I had established that the only time we raise our voices in the house is if there is an emergency…meaning, someone gets badly hurt, Bentley is about to get eaten by a coyote, – you get the idea – and Manu is usually pretty good about abiding by this rule. So, I rushed over and asked him what happened. Manu exclaimed, “LOOK! MICAH!” There was Micah, sitting on the living room floor, knocking over all of Manu’s block towers that he was building. And Micah had no remorse at that. Manu had even tried asking Micah to stop and he wouldn’t. It was a disaster.
My temptation was to explain to Manu that what was happening didn’t fall into the category of a “disaster” and wasn’t reason enough for raising his voice as he had done. In that moment, I was reminded of something I had read a while back:
“Parents should know how to sympathize with their children in their little troubles, that look as large to them as older people’s trials look to them,” ST May 20, 1889.
Parents “should…mingle with the children, sympathizing with them in their little troubles, binding them to their hearts by the strong bonds of love,” RC 174. (also found in AH)
I had thought about my childhood.
My first clear memory was my first day of kindergarten and I was age 4. I remember what craft we did – we were pasting together traffic signals – and I also remember the emotional rush of being away from my entire family and with (at that time) complete strangers for the A.M. session. I also rode the bus all by myself.
Well, Imanuel is age 4. And I remember being age 4. I don’t know why this intrigues me so much, but it does. I find myself trying to empathize with him more, but at the same time, remembering my role as his mother. Here’s a list of some of my “major disasters” from childhood:
– Having to give away Kitty’s kittens.
– Wanting to go to McDonald’s really badly, but Dad saying no.
– Missing the school bus and having to walk/run to school and not be tardy.
– My sister or a friend not wanting to play with me.
– Getting a “B” on my report card.
It seems so silly now, but at the time, it was serious and emotions would run high. If we think back, we would remember how those bitter (or sweet) interactions between our siblings, parents, and friends at home, church, or in school were our lives.
The Lord so patiently listens to all of our worries, and more amazingly, He deeply cares about our feelings. So, I’ve been trying to remember what it was like. I’ve always wanted my priority to be caring for my boys. What this means now is being a good listener and knowing how to respond to their “little troubles”, their disappointments, their sadness. I need Jesus to give me wisdom. Even though I will probably fail them on more than one occasion, I want them to know that I’m trying to understand their young hearts, and to be reasonable. After all, I’d gladly fix “disasters” at this age when a hug or kiss can make everything better, than when they grow up and experience what “real” life is all about!
One of my current “little troubles”. The Lord has been merciful and after just 2 days of consistent training, Micah has been doing great at using the potty. HALLELUJAH!
Hope everyone has a restful, relaxing Sabbath day!
